A Mystery.................

I was all set to introduce yet another family on Grace Street, but The Bucketheads will have to until the next installment. However, due to a special request I'm writing on a different topic.

Years ago at a place I used to work, the ladies room was sort of an imaginary fantasyland. Part of it, I'll admit was part of my own doing.

The door to the ladies room faced the door going out to the office lobby. One night as we were leaving the office, someone was leaving the ladies room. One of my male coworkers noticed that there was a sofa alongside on of the walls.

"Good Grief!!!! You women have a sofa in there? We don't have anything like that in the mens room. When we don't feel good, we just stay home."

So....me being me, told him that we had the sofa because we needed a place to sit while Consuela makes our margaritas.

"Who the h*ll is Consuela?" he asked.

"Our ladies room attendant."

"I'm not buying the margarita BS....but y'all don't actually have a ladies room attendant, do you?"

Well....I figured if he was actually stupid enough to believe that, why not carry it further?

"Sure. Consuela is great. She can do manicures, pedicures, she listens to us b*tch about the men in the off.....oops! She listens to us vent about work, and she keeps the bathroom neat as a pin."

"Oh that's a load of crap. How come I've never seen her?"

"Well....have you ever been in the ladies room?"

"Never mind.....holler in there and tell her to come out."

"Can't."

"How come?"

"Consuela's deaf."

Well, word went around the office about that little story and with embellishment from other women in the office, pretty soon our small ladies room, with three stalls, three sinks, a wall mirror, a broken products machine, and a ragged old sofa also had a bar, an office for the shy and deaf Consuela, and Consuela also now had an assistant named Paloma. Our wonderful ladies room also had a margarita machine, massage table, and an adjustable chair that we used whenever Consuela cut our hair or gave us pedicures. Paloma handled our manicures.

Even the president of the company was impressed. He had his own private bathroom that just had a toilet and sink. But, as far as he was concerned, since Consuela and Paloma worked for tips only, they weren't costing the company anything so he was fine with it.

Which brings us to today......well, actually yesterday since I worked from home today.

There have been major strides lately in the office ladies room where I currently work. (Actually, the fact that essentials such as soap and paper towels are stocked somewhat regularly rather than the previous semi annual schedule is a major stride.)

While there is no Consuela or Paloma, no massage table, bar, margarita machine, etc....there apparently has been a new addition. A radio. A radio that is tuned to an oldies station.

Why?, you must be asking. Well, therein lies the mystery.

My guess is that my request for a jukebox was shot down so the radio was a cheap substitute. (No....I did not request a jukebox! That was a JOKE! Although......there *IS* a suggestion box in the breakroom......hmm. Maybe I ought to put that request in just to see if it gets a response.)

When I first saw the radio, I thought maybe someone had just left it in there to recharge the battery or something, but every cubicle has an electrical outlet so that was out.

So...I have no idea as to the purpose of this radio. I have no idea if there is a radio in the mens room and I don't really care enough to find out.

However, if word gets out that there is a radio in the ladies room, someone may just decide to squeal equal rights and demand one for the mens room.

But I still would like to know the thinking behind this decision.

But now that we have it, I think a few suggestions are in order.

I think that the stations need to be rotated so that everyone gets to listen to their favorite music. One day can be urban/rap day (I'm not going to push for that, though), another day can be country day, another day can be talk radio day. I'll be Neal Boortz would be rather impressed that he is playing in the second floor ladies room of our office. Take that, El Rushbo!

For our next request, I think we need a phone. That way, if we're in there when the radio station is having a contest for say....caller 98 wins a cruise, we've got the phone right there. Actually, if we want to get even more ridiculous, every STALL needs it's own phone. That way, no one has to trip over themselves to get to the one phone.

Oh wait....even better! Stick a few pcs in there two. Desktops, though, not notebooks. The way people have been crashing notebooks lately, someone is liable to flush one and I don't think the chief in charge of approving notebook purchases would be very happy. Although, I can think of a few people that are perfectly capable of attempting to flush a desktop down the toilet and when asked why they would pull an Urkel and say "Did I do that?"

I'm going to just leave it at that. Oh, and by the way.....just in case a certain someone who is on vacation and shall remain nameless is beginning to freak out at that thought of installing phones and desktops pcs in the ladies room......I'm KIDDING!!!! (But, I'm seriously considering asking about that jukebox, though.)